How Do You Confront Difficult Colleagues | iTrainingExpert

How To Confront Difficult Colleagues?

It's a fact of life.

Regardless of how professionally you compose yourself or how politely you present yourself in the workplace, you will inevitably have to face difficult colleagues who seem determined to make your day worse for no reason whatsoever. Outside of office hours, you would have the luxury of ignoring them or dealing with them however way you see fit, but in the workplace this requires a certain amount of finesse.

The difficulty of dealing with individuals like these is that there is no standard solution you could apply to everyone. Some people are upset, demotivated or irrational for a variety of different reasons that may not be so obvious to you. Certain people require certain approaches.

Especially in the workplace where, irrespective of how you feel about each other, a standard of professionalism must always be followed.

Let's focus on a few effective methods on how to confront difficult colleagues in the workplace.

"CONSIDERATION"

Let's be honest, this is definitely not the first thing that comes to mind when dealing with difficult colleagues, but in most cases it may be all that's needed.

Most people are not irrational agents of chaos going out of their way to be a nuisance. More often than not, they too are feeling the burden of a great deal of stress and are lashing out because they can't cope. If so, the best approach is to engage emphatically.

Sit them down, be honest about how their attitude is having a negative effect on you, but also follow up with asking why they're feeling that way and how you can work together to improve things. Keep in mind that your questions may not receive direct answers because if the other party is indeed suffering through something very personal, they're unlikely to share the whole story with you if you're both not close.

However, the very fact that you're making a sincere effort to engage and reach out may be enough to get the other party to realize the harmful effect they're having on other people and course correct. A sincere demonstration of empathy always comes off as more respectful than being openly confrontational.

"TAKE IT UP UPSTAIRS"

If the other party's behavior becomes inexcusable, it's time to stand up for yourself. You can firmly confront them about how you don't appreciate being constantly disrespected and that if this continues you will have no choice but to take it up with HR. And you should if such disrespect continues.

You have an ethical and professional obligation to stand up for yourself. Make an effort to articulate just how much the other party is disrupting your productivity and making you uncomfortable. Be as firm as possible so that management understands the severity of the problem and is forced to intervene.

A direct reprimand from upper management is enough to make most troublemakers cease and desist. However, it should be noted that this is a last resort. If you knock on the management's door too quickly and if it happens more than once, you risk creating the impression that you simply don't work well with others regardless of whether you were in the wrong or not.

It is extremely important to note that while you may see the situation in a very clear-cut way, your management may not. Best-case scenario, an amicable mediation is conducted to both parties' satisfaction, Worst-case scenario, both are viewed as equally culpable and given a formal warning, which never looks good on your record.

"INTROSPECTION"

What if, hear us out, you're the bad guy?

Sometimes the most effective way to confront a difficult colleague is to look in the mirror. Nobody ever thinks they're the problem because we're all the heroes of our own story, but therein lies the rub. If everyone thinks they're the hero, no one knows when they're acting like the villain.

With that in mind, take stock of our actions and analyze if there was any possibility of you being the antagonist in your situation. It might feel like the most difficult thing in the world to do, especially if you really, really, dislike the other person, but at the end of the day, maturity pays off and lack of introspection carries a high cost.

Imagine if you were to carry on in blissful ignorance of the problems you were causing in the workplace; smugly convinced that you weren't the problem. Not only will your toxic presence be derailing any opportunity you might get to create fruitful professional friendships, but if things get bad enough, you might get abruptly disciplined, or worse, outright terminated. It is simply not worth it.

At the end of the day, dealing with difficult people is a two-way street. However, way it ends, both parties first need to engage with each other to find an amicable solution. Prolonging things will only reflect badly on all parties involved.

Thank you for reading our piece. We hope it was useful for you. If you're interested in upskilling yourself or your team, click on any of the recommended courses below for more information.